I think most women have a longing to be a mother. I know I certainly always have done. Thankfully I was well aware of the work that you would need to put in due to being the eldest of 7 children and that holding a lot of responsibility. I had also seen my mother go through at least one miscarriage and was there to care for her when she did. It never crossed my mind that this might happen to me though.
Every life counts
Prior to our first round of IVF last March, I had dealt with 3 losses. The first one was many years ago due to a position I was forced into. I don’t really talk about it – but I’ll never forget. The next two were more recently at the end of 2013 and, then, the end of 2014 – both of which I wrote about in my post ‘Baby Loss is a Bitch‘. Finally, I cannot forget the 4 tiny embryos which were transferred into my womb in March last year. Ross and I guarded those babies with our lives but, despite the fact that they never made it, I will never forget the fact that it was the start of of new life.
My saving Grace
I count myself extremely lucky to be the mother to my daughter, Grace. She is now 10 years old and is a wise, old head on young shoulders. Sometimes I have felt that she is more of a grown-up than me (but don’t tell her I said that!). My first Mother’s Day was a bit of a wash-out no thanks to her father but the second was wonderful. I was with all my family, Grace was 15 months old and my mum and at least one of my sisters bought me a Mother’s Day card from her, worried that I wouldn’t get one. Thankfully, ever since, Ross has made sure that every year it is extra special and he and Grace love to plot together behind my back!
Of course, this year, it becomes different again. Not only will I be celebrating Mother’s Day with Grace – something I was dreadfully upset about not being able to do last year because of our first treatment – but I am also carrying our little boy. I’m not sure what is planned but knowing Ross and Grace it will be something special. This doesn’t mean that I will ever forget the babies that I have lost though. I will also be thinking of all the ladies I have met along the way during our journey in trying to conceive. So many that I have cried with, had support from and shared losses with – both mine and theirs. All mothers in their own right.
Kicks Count is a UK registered charity which empowers mums to be with knowledge and confidence throughout their pregnancies. I have written about them in my post ‘Pregnancy Now Compared to 10 Years Ago‘ and also shared the fact that I was now using their app and wristband in my pregnancy diary last week due to the fact that our little boy is starting to move. I have to say that I never tire of feeling him wriggle – even at 3 o’clock in the morning.
This year, Kicks Count are celebrating Mother’s Day by creating personalised heart images, to celebrate ALL mums. They are looking to encourage mums to openly celebrate being a parent to all of their children. So, if you count any angels among your children, they are giving you the chance to proudly say their name by including them in your image.
Remember all your children
Kicks Count are asking for a donation of at least £3 per Mother’s Day heart. Just £3 could fund the printing of 100 maternity note inserts for an NHS Trust to give to expectant mothers inside their pregnancy notes, so that they always have vital information about movement on hand.
You can buy up to 4 Hearts using the form over on their site. If you would like more than 4 then you would need to make your donation and email firstname.lastname@example.org with the names you would like. You can also purchase hearts by texting the word KICKS to 70660 with the amount you would like to give and the name (or names) you would like to appear below the heart. For example, KICKS £3 (name) or KICKS £5 (name) and (name).
Hearts will be personalised within 3 days and then shared over in the Kicks Count Facebook album.