Following my series on YouTube, The Conception Diaries, following our attempts to get pregnant, I am thrilled to say that after nearly 4 years of trying, 2 losses and one failed IVF attempt, our dream has finally come true and our baby is due in July 2017.
Because I have been too tired to vlog, I have kept a written diary of what has happened so far and will go back to vlogging just as soon as I can!
Away for the weekend
Grace went off to her fathers on Saturday so Ross and I spent Sunday morning wrapping all her presents. Then, late Sunday afternoon, we travelled to Surrey to stay with my mum. I had been craving a chicken korma with mushroom rice for a few days and had told my mum – so we had an Indian takeaway that evening.
It was great to be able to catch up with my family and fill them in properly. Unfortunately the headache struck again! It could have been because I was watching the final of The Apprentice (I had been watching it for work purposes as I was tweeting on behalf of one of my clients)!
It was a very sleepless night. I woke at 3am and found it very difficult to get back to sleep. I spent the following day in a bit of a daze.
Ross and I went shopping in Woking the following morning. He picked up a bratwurst sausage for his breakfast and I ordered a decaf gingerbread latte from Costa. Another craving satisfied – although this is more of a Christmas one!
Grace and Lily
Grace returned to my mums that afternoon. Then my sister in law came over with my three year old niece, Lily. It was wonderful to see a small one in our midst. Grace really looked after her and it really gave Ross and I an image of what is, hopefully, to come.
The drive home
Ross had prepared his Top 100 songs (something we regularly do) for the drive to and from Woking. Grace got to share his Top 40 with us. I was in tears as I heard his number one. It was ‘I Love My Life’ by Robbie Williams and, if you have listened to the lyrics, then you will know that he has written it for his children. It has also taken on this meaning for Ross. I thought that this was lovely.
My last acupuncture of the year and another appointment
On Tuesday morning I went to my final acupuncture appointment of the year. I took Louise a small Christmas present to say thank you for everything she had done for me this year.
As she took my pulses, I looked at her face for a sign to see if everything was OK. She told me all was well. She told me that she had been wrong on NUMEROUS occasions but the fact that my right pulse was slightly stronger means that it is a girl! Ross and I have decided to find out the gender so it will be interesting to see if she is right.
One of the things that I had been suffering with was blocked sinuses. When Louise put a needle either side of my nose it felt like someone had given me a massive dose of olbas oil! I could breathe instantly.
Our 10 week scan
On Thursday morning I received confirmation of my 12 week scan. It is on 5th January at 10.3oam but today was special. Today was the day when we were going for our 10 week scan – but this time we were taking Grace with us. We arrived at the hospital a little early as I wanted to take a gift to Helen, our fertility nurse, as a thank you for everything that she has done for us this year. She has been one of the most helpful people throughout this process and this was just a small way of showing her how much we appreciate what she has done. We went upstairs to see Lisa once again, and to introduce Grace to her. Ross and Grace decided to mess around in an empty waiting room whilst I sat and laughed at them. Lisa then asked a couple of questions and sent us downstairs to the sonographers department.
We sat waiting for longer than usual so Ross, Grace and I sat and chatted. At one point both Helen and Sue, the sonographers, were in the office together and I presented them with a box of biscuits to say thank you and wished them both a Merry Christmas. I went to sit back down and both sonographers disappeared back into their respective rooms. Then, a couple exited Sue’s room. The lady was in tears and the poor man who followed looked so upset. It stopped me in my tracks. I had been there and felt this. I knew what they were going through and I shed some tears for them.
A special moment
Sue then took us in. She told me that she and Helen had argued over who was going to have me! I told her that they should take it in turns – which they had so far! As Grace sat on Ross’ knee, Sue started to scan my tummy and then the baby appeared. Grace was thrilled. She told us that it was so cute. She loved it so much. It was a truly special moment.
We then back upstairs and saw Lisa. She took us aside into another room as the couple who had suffered the loss were in the main room. She was being taken in straight away. I told Lisa that I was so sorry and sad for them. She told me that I needed to remain positive. That this was my time and I deserved every happy moment of it. I was grateful for her words.
Ross, Grace and I decided to pick up a KFC as a special treat and returned home very happy. Grace felt it was even more real now.
Nowhere near as tired as I was and my upset stomachs have stopped. In fact, it seems to have gone the other way! I am still snoring badly. Sorry Ross!