Prose for Thought – I Try

It’s one of my favourite times of the week. Prose for Thought day. A little bit of culture and calm in a very busy world 🙂

Firstly thank you to everyone who supported my first Poetry and Prose Round-up over on BritMums. If you haven’t seen it yet and read all the poetry from the people included then please pop across here.

This week I have written about my trials and tribulations of trying to deal with still having Grace’s father in her life. She still sees him and talks about him often. There are times I want to scream and shout and tell her what he did to me and thus, in turn, her but I can’t be the one to tell her this. It will just look like sour grapes from me so I just have to trust that she will see it for herself and try to piece it together with the help of other people. Then she can ask me the questions she needs the answers to. My poem kind of sums up my day to day struggle.

I Try

I try

I try not to take sides

I try to take the right side

I try to do the right thing

I try to do the right thing for you

I try all the time to make sure you are protected

I try every day in every single way not to bad mouth

I try to show you right from wrong and good from bad

I try to hide my true feelings despite wanting to tell you so much

I try to take the moral high ground every time and bring you up to understand

I try. I will try to set an example every day to help you try not to make the same mistakes I did

 

Copyright Victoria Welton 10th July 2013

 

I would really love and appreciate your comments below – and please, go and visit and comment on, the poems from the people who link up :)

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24 Comments

  1. Galina V
    July 14, 2013 / 2:49 pm

    I can feel your frustration in this emotional poem. But you do the right thing, and one day your child will be able to see her father in the true light, and she’ll be grateful to you for all you valiant efforts.

  2. July 12, 2013 / 9:26 am

    Oh I can so empathise with this poem.
    C’s dad left when C was 3 and I made a conscious effort to never bad mouth him in front of C, it never stopped other people (on his side) doing it about me though.
    But I felt I was doing the right thing, it wasn’t C’a fault his dad couldn’t handle being a parent.
    Keep going, keep strong, you’re absolutely doing the best for your G x
    Jeannette @autismmumma recently posted..Squeal! Thursday 11th July 2013My Profile

  3. July 11, 2013 / 10:33 am

    Oh bless you, you can really feel your weariness in this poem. You’re doing the right thing, but also the most difficult thing. Putting Grace first. So sorry you’ve all that to contend with xxx
    Dragonsflypoppy recently posted..How does your garden grow?My Profile

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:01 am

      Thank you so much lovely, appreciate your kind words xx

  4. nortonmum
    July 11, 2013 / 9:20 am

    I felt your words. How much we worry about how our words and decisions affect our children. I agree with Cathie B the support your daughter has from you will help her . Hope you are all looking forward to life in your new home.
    nortonmum recently posted..Is finding your dream school just pure luck?My Profile

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:01 am

      Thank you so much lovely xx

  5. Karen Bell
    July 11, 2013 / 8:21 am

    I think we can all relate to that. I feel like I spend my whole day just trying. Well written 🙂

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:02 am

      Thank you 🙂 It’s amazing what strength we can draw upon 🙂

  6. Ellie
    July 11, 2013 / 8:13 am

    Ah – this must be so difficult and I can feel the frustration in your poem. The right choices are often the ones that require the hardest work…*sigh* Big hugs to you and your girl x
    Ellie recently posted..Help!My Profile

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:02 am

      So very true – and thank you. Big hugs back x

  7. Emma from over at LIFE AS IT IS
    July 11, 2013 / 8:09 am

    Vicky, I cannot imagine how difficult it must be not to let the odd snide remark slip, but stick to your guns. In the end, good always overcomes bad, the truth will out, and eventually, she will make up her own mind. x
    Emma from over at LIFE AS IT IS recently posted..FRAMEDMy Profile

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:03 am

      It isn’t easy but thank you – I feel exactly the same way about the truth will out and she will see xx

  8. July 11, 2013 / 7:54 am

    This is full of emotion. Very powerful. I agree this is one of my favourites. You are being so strong for your daughter and doing the right thing xx

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:05 am

      Thanks so much Emily, and so pleased you like it 🙂

  9. Sarah Miles
    July 11, 2013 / 7:48 am

    As a mother I can understand your frustration and infignance.

    However, my mum bad-mouthed my dad and as I have got older I find myself becomimg more and more resentful of her for it, even though there was truth in what she said. I think you are doing the right thing, but the right path is often the hardest, isn’t it?
    X

    • Sarah again
      July 11, 2013 / 7:49 am

      Ha! infignance! That really should be a word….

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:07 am

      I had similar Sarah so need to make sure that the cycle is broken – and yes, infignance is a great word! 🙂 x

  10. Lorraine (Gin & Cornflakes)
    July 11, 2013 / 7:32 am

    I can feel your frustration Vic – must be so hard. I think this is my favourite too. Can tell how you’re feeling with every pen stroke (keyboard bash???) Take it out on the words 😉 Grace looks like such a grown up girl – she will appreciate your ‘trying’ (and I’m sure you succeed chick) in the years to come definitely. Much love xx
    Lorraine (Gin & Cornflakes) recently posted..On Writing a First Short Story…. “Even Then…”My Profile

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:09 am

      Thanks lovely, yep – better to take the frustration out in a poem on here than anywhere else. She really is too grown up sometimes! Thank you so much for your words of support, they really mean a lot xx

  11. Stephanie
    July 11, 2013 / 7:27 am

    I think this is my favourite of all the poems I have read by you. I can sense your righteous anger, frustration and your love for your daughter. It feels like a very connected piece of writing.
    Stephanie recently posted..Summer of Words Part 2My Profile

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:09 am

      Thank you so much Stephanie, really appreciate that xx

  12. Cathie B
    July 11, 2013 / 7:23 am

    Oh honey – I can only guess how difficult it is for you and how the past must have been. Your strength and character always shines through and I admire you for overcoming some damn horrible stuff. You have an amazing future with your lovely family and Grace will always know that you were there, all the time. xxxx

    • July 11, 2013 / 11:10 am

      Thank you so much – it’s the future that helps me to focus and stay positive 🙂 x

  13. July 11, 2013 / 7:06 am

    It must be incredibly tough: you don’t want to deny her a relationship with her Dad and yet… All respect to you. xx
    Judith recently posted..EchoMy Profile

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